Such a background is a crappy excuse, I know. I've known better for a really long time, and I chose (I chose) not to act on that knowledge. But one thing I know beyond question is that people can do anything. Anything. I can chose to eat Oreos, or I can choose to eat something healthy. Underlying the choice, however, are the feelings of emptiness, which I also have a choice to dismiss. When I exercise those choices, good things happen. It's all pretty simple really.
Yesterday was pretty incredible. I went out on a 3 hour bike ride, but felt so great at the halfway point that I continued on to get in an even 60 miles (3:30:00). Fifty of those were good, but the last 10 were some of the hardest miles I've ever ridden. Not nearly enough nutrition to pull me through (minus over 3,000 calories replaced by only 200 during the ride). Still, it was epic and I loved it. I had an artificial weight of 175.5 (down from 179 in the morning). It looks nice. I managed to replace
Time to move beyond who I was to who I am. It's a choice.